Overcome.

Oooh guys! It's the weekend!

The weekend in the truest sense for me, and not just a word meaning "the week is coming to an end soon, just work one more day and then you'll have a little break. just a little one." But rather for the first time this Summer I have a SATURDAY off work! And Monday! The Monday happening only because half-price sales at thrift stores are kind of big deals around our house.

A plethora of time, and I'm almost lost wondering what to do with this thing I have become slightly unaccustomed to. -- spare time.

It's glorious, luxurious! I have so far gone for a bike ride, painted my toe nails, and listened to Christmas music (always necessary).

Yet. Spare time is not all in the world that makes me happy. It is not the solution to all my problems.

Ya'll (I feign association to that word, and use it very un-sincerely), I'm very thankful.
Do you, have you ever been in a phase of life that is just so hard?
Like you can feel the hardship in every breath? Somethings off, somethings missing, something, many somethings I have absolutely no power to overcome of my own?
Gracious, but I thank God for pushing me to my knees so He can give me His strength to stand again. Rather than relying on my pitiful nothingness.

Overcome? I cannot overcome. Let me tell you I've tried! Last year. the year before. overcoming is not exactly my forte. (overcoming what? I'll leave that in a hazy vagueness of the unimportant things that constitute myself and doings)
Yet!

"These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world." 
 John 16:33

"For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith."
1 John 5:4

Only when it is no longer through my strength or by my strength or for solely myself that I attempt this overcoming, may I overcome.
And it's funny how the reason you do things even changes with the changing of strength by which you do them. The whole world takes on a whole new meaning by the new meaning with which you live.

Tis what I think.
My ponderings.
Forgive me, for they are not great.

Only the sun is still kissing the trees outside my window, and the calling birds still think it a beautiful day, so perhaps, having written my little heart out, I shall go outside and like this calm evening world, smile too.